Avoid Catastrophe! Act Now!
For the paltry sum of ONLY $454.23 for each megabyte of data or fraction thereof, we will download it to a safe haven in our fire, water, cockroach, fungus, and burglar proof corporate vaults. (The cost figure quoted includes $6.32 per megabyte for Shipping & Handling). The whole operation will be painless and almost instantaneous!
Just multiply the number of megabytes that you want uploaded by $454.23 and send that amount by postal money order, cashier's check, or cash to:
Weelyka Urmonee, Inc.
7888 Wannamor Way
Gotcha, Louisiana 14245
(Sorry, we are unable to accept personal checks)
Due to our fantastically low price, we cannot insure your data against physical damage, loss, or theft, so be sure to retain complete copies of everything in your own carefully guarded and otherwise secure local files.